Confession: I still don’t know what I am going to be when I grow up; I am not even sure that I will grow up; or that I even want to; especially if it means giving up my dreams and settling for the status quo.
I suppose in some ways I have always gone against the grain. Not because I want to be difficult, but more because I pondered the various possibilites, not readily accepting all of the conventions set before me. Why must I have a successful job or career in a field I dislike while I struggle to juggle my responsibilities at home, and try to make time to raise my children? I have several Supermom and Dad friends who do just that – and well too. I think of them with admiration; which turns into guilt that I too don’t do it all; which promptly turns into relief that I do not have to; and gratitude that I may choose not to. I digress…
What I want is to be happy, and to raise happy children, who will grow into happy adults. I don’t believe there is a prescribed method to achieve this dream. The path to such bliss is different for each of us. One thing is for certain though – it all starts with me. Each day, we are given another opportunity to improve ourselves, to make necessary changes and adjustments, to strive for goodness – greatness even.
Two of the most important lessons I have learned (mostly the hard way) to be true are: The more I express gratitude for each of my blessings, the larger the list of things to be grateful for becomes. And, whatever I devote my time and attention to will expand, whether positive or negative in nature makes no difference, it will grow in any case.
It has taken me a while to understand that where I am and where I am going is a direct reflection of the choices I have made and will continue to make. And I choose to follow my own heart’s bliss, regardless of the accepted cultural standards that whisper to me, “The Jones’ do it best! Why aren’t you keeping up with them?”
I always found the Jones’ to be a bit of a bore anyway.