What The FEX?

Let’s just get it out in the open. Maya Angelou was right all along. (Yes Jill, my most vocal friend, you were right too!) And I was terribly, dreadfully wrong. That’s the bad news. The good news is…I have evicted FEX from my basement! (Wild applause, cheers and a cartwheel-finish into a split!) Yep! I made a huge mistake, and then I rectified it! (More wild applause)

A lot has transpired in the last few months. Without exposing the disparaging details, I will say that FEX had managed to successfully break every verbal agreement we had made regarding our co-parenting (only) living arrangement. As FEX is fond of saying, “Things change man,” in his careless, dude-like manner. And change they did.

Drumroll please! And the great epiphone! I woke up and realized that being a good Mom does NOT mean I have to sacrifice my personal space nor my peace-of-mind. Having their Dad in my house was draining my happiness. It was like a black hole with a thousand Dyson vacuums inside of it, easily sucking up my joy, like dog hair on a hardwood floor. And that my friends is never the best way to be a good Mom.

I fell into the trap of believing that I should keep their father around at all costs. Mainly and specifically, the cost of my sanity. My children will still see thier father. If I have my wish, he will always remain in their lives. However, I will no longer be dragged around by his agenda. This realization and emacipation feels amazing. I could scream from the rooftops, “I deserve to be happy too!” And I am just that. Happy.

I will promptly resume all joyful activities, including but certainly not limited to getting back to you all, my wordpress family. Thanks for the support. I have missed this place. The possibilities are winking at me. Things are looking up. I think Maya would be proud.

Photo credit: http://imunsinkable.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/Scream50sWoman2.jpg


12 thoughts on “What The FEX?

  1. Rosemarie says:

    My lovely Victoria, I am beyond proud of you!!! You have seen the light and it is shinning down upon you and my two favorite children. You deserve happiness and your children are happy when you are happy. I’m sure Maya is proud of you…but not as much as I am!!!. Next step is…”A CHAMPION” for you.
    Just as I say to my Daughter…”Love You Near or Far”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I was wondering where you had gone to…hadn’t seen you in awhile. Welcome back! Come join my new linky #momsterslink at http://wp.me/p5fmoJ-i7

    Liked by 1 person

  3. jillpinner says:

    Welcome back, thank God fex is out!! Did not want to be so called right, just sometimes it is easier to see something for what it is when not in the situation. Sorry i am so vocal, just that when someone i love is possible making a mistake, i just want them to avoid it..love you and you are a awesome mom and dad to those beans of yours, remember that!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. That’s my girl! I am beyond proud of you, and especially overjoyed that the FEX Is gone, so you can continue writing again. I look forward to your musings as I do any best seller that I read, I can’t wait for the next installment!
    We also need to have that dinner, so you’ve got to give me your schedule. I love you to the moon….don’t forget that.


  5. vivalove@wordpress.com says:

    Bravo! And not that anyone was right or wrong. That is just a random opinion. A Judgement dare I say. And only one entity has that power.
    I simply say Bravo to what you have currently found your contentment and peace with. And thus gained your own wisdom on where your own limits lie and not the limits of others – what works for YOU.
    In short, you’re happy. Bravo!
    Love you much dear friend! God bless.


  6. Tony says:

    Great blog. Glad you are happy and back writing again. Loved the Dyson line! Looking foward to reading about what the chapter in your life has in store for you!


  7. mamalisa4 says:

    I too am proud! You are the strongest woman I know and prove your resilience time and time again. I LOVE that no matter what situation you are in, you find the solution, the positive side and most importantly the lesson. You are wise, caring, loving and a tough cookie 😉 Onward and Upward!!!!! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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